Friday, Friday, unnecessary censorship Friday! (That's how it goes, right?)
Every week, Jimmy Kimmel introduces a brand-new batch of clips that have been needlessly censored for the sole-purpose of making us giggle like children. And it works every time.
Watch all the way to the end for what is possibly the most upsetting Batman clip ever.
Animal's graphic TV appearance watched by millions
All eyes should have been on the delicious array of cakes and pastries prepared by the finalists of the Great British Bake Off.
But winner Joanne Wheatley’s moment of glory had to play second fiddle to a squirrel.
The rodent, seen loitering in the grounds of the mansion where the BBC2 show was filmed, was the subject of a lingering camera shot.
Exposed: The squirrel has become a sensation on social networking sites
And viewers could not help noticing its unmistakably masculine appearance.
Clips were posted on YouTube, while hundreds took to social networks and TV forums to discuss it.
One joked: ‘This evening’s Great British Bake Off contains full-frontal squirrel nudity which some viewers may find startling.’
Another said: ‘A squirrel is flashing everyone on the Great British Bake Off.’
Others were more disturbed by the image, complaining it was an unnecessary and unwelcome distraction on a show about baking. Since the programme was recorded some time ago, it could easily have been edited out.
One viewer commented: ‘Why did the cameraman focus on the squirrel at all? I just didn’t need to see that.’ A record five million viewers saw grandmother Mrs Wheatley crowned Queen of the Bake Off on Tuesday night.
She beat thousands of other amateur bakers, including favourite Holly Bell, to win after wowing judges Mary Berry and John Hollywood with her ‘pretty’ and ‘girly’ array of cakes and pastries.
She is now tipped to be a star in her own right and is expected to be offered a cookery book deal.
Sweet victory: Joanne Wheatley triumphed, despite being rather upstaged by the attention-seeking squirrel
The 41-year-old mother of three sons, who was married at 17, honed her culinary skills making cakes for her boys, who regularly scored her out of ten for her efforts.
Mrs Wheatley taught herself to cook with a combination of recipe books and experimentation, as well as ‘tough feedback’ from her children.
The housewife from Essex battled crippling nerves throughout the eight-week competition but impressed judges with her creativity and skill.
The second series of the programme, presented by Sue Perkins and Melanie Giedroyc, has been the surprise television hit of the year and superseded Masterchef as the must-watch show for cookery fans.
Filming took place at Valentines Mansion and Gardens in Essex, where all the contestants had a baking station and presented their efforts in the lush gardens surrounded by bunting.
The programme has sent demand for baking products soaring.
Marks & Spencer reports sales increases of up to 20 per cent in ingredients, while John Lewis has seen a 46 per cent rise in sales of three-tier cake stands and cake tins and muffin trays.
After a blissful three week break from the trials and tribulations of television recap and review, it was almost a delight to return to Perfect Couples, to really settle in and enjoy the very worst that television has to offer.
Of course, that’s not quite fair. For the sake of pithy asides I’m ignoring the deep wounds that reality, talk show and garden network television have cut into the international collective unconscious; the numb feeling I get watching cable news; the commercials depicting Frosted Mini-Wheats that are sexually attracted to other types of Frosted Mini-Wheats. Against the absolute deluge of tiring, nonsensical slush that is piped daily into homes across the world, what is Perfect Couples but a comforting break in the bleakness, a quiet blank place within which we may comfortably escape and lose ourselves in the lives of six friends who happen to mostly be married to each other?
That said, I’m going to turn this hate-train around and tell you everything good about tonight’s episode of Perfect Couples!
Included in tonight’s episode were several “jokes,” some of which made me exhale in barely-acknowledged mirth. Rex suddenly being at a sewing machine while the other two guys are trying to figure out what to do about the destroyed wedding dress was the best, and taking second place was the phoned-in jab at Canadian bacon. At least they didn’t make any hockey or French jokes, choosing only to criticize Canada’s politeness and ham. Way to be the bigger show, Perfect Couples!
No acts of genocide were committed by, in the name of, or as a by-product of this episode. Yet.
While the flashback structure of the episode was pointless and underwrought, it did create the illusion of quality and allowed us, the viewers, to really admire the skilled editing that goes into creating such needless obfuscation!
It’s either the third or fourth last episode of this joy-inducing television program!
OK, so maybe this new season of Dancing With the Stars doesn't have an obvious frontrunner for all the others to shoot at, or the sort of awkward phony celebrity that viewers enjoy verbally shooting at. But the premiere episode of Season 12 featured real quality from a few dancers, and the promise of at least some entertainment from several others. This season might not be so bad after all!
As has usually been the case on DWTS, the first week is set aside for the new dancers to get accustomed to hoofing in public, and no one will be going home (though voting did take place, and this week's scores will be combined with next week's). This will be good news for a couple of folks in particular. First impressions ahead:
Respect for elders: It's never a good thing for the rest of the competitors when the likely fan favorites also get the highest scores, and that was the case this week when the field was topped by Ralph Macchio, who clearly has a decrepit portrait of himself stowed in an attic somewhere; and Kirstie Alley, who introduced herself to us by saying, "If someone told me to haul ass, it would take two trips."
Kirstie got the coveted anchor spot, an acknowledgement of her status as the star people were most eager to see, for good or ill (recall that David Hasselhoff danced last in the first episode of Season 11 -- his only episode). But there were no fireworks between her and Maksim Chmerkovskiy, just some worries that she might not be in ideal shape for this, considering she's 60 and carries some extra weight. Their cha cha cha (to "F You," of all things) was loose and fun, but was also surprisingly put together for a first week. And it was nice to see Maks having a good time again (I guess the Ukranian Bachelor gig would put anyone in a carefree mood).
But Kirstie's score of 23 was surpassed by Ralph, who had a tougher assignment in having to do a foxtrot. I didn't have much of a sense of how he'd look out there -- having done karate in a 25-year-old movie doesn't say as much about one's ballroom potential as Dirty Dancing did for Jennifer Grey -- but he and Karina Smirnoff were elegant and in sync. Yeah, I found myself distracted by his weirdly Bieberesque hair, and I'm not sure Karina is the ideal partner for Ralph -- you can't refer to yourself as "sexy, sultry" without coming across badly -- but he has the nostalgia appeal of Jennifer without the stigma of being a ringer, or (at least so far) the weekly drama concerning injuries. Just off the lead: One can make a case that Disney moppet Chelsea Kane was actually the best dancer on Monday, but she and Mark Ballas went first and were given conservative scores as a result. Chelsea already seems a little sweet on partner Mark, and their foxtrot showed she has a dancer's carriage. The question going forward will be whether she can exploit her personality as Kyle Massey was able to last season. Joining Chelsea with a 21 was Hines Ward, who (we were gloriously reminded a couple of times) is coming off having lost a Super Bowl. His cha cha with Kym Johnson didn't display a lot of technique, but it was fine for a first night, and the natural grace a wide receiver needs will start working for him soon. The best thing he has going for him is attitude -- the NFL guys who have done best on this series are the ones who have let us see their enthusiasm. Not quite contenders: The three dancers in the middle of the scoring are all capable of making it to May, but could also be in danger of a surprise ouster if they don't improve. The big issue with Romeo, finally appearing on DWTS five years after an injury forced him out pre-season, isn't natural ability or athleticism, which he seems to have in great supply. It's the attitude he gives off that ballroom dancing is beneath him, or even effeminate. He's willing to put the work in, unlike his famously lazy father Master P -- but he's going to have to get over the idea that his street cred will be forever lost if gets serious about his steps. Chelsie Hightower was patient with him, and did her best to rescue the cha cha with her energy, but their score of 19 will be a high-water mark if her partner can't pull a Hines and loosen up.
By contrast, Kendra Wilkinson seems to have a winning demeanor, and had a good old time cracking wise with Louis Van Amstel in rehearsal. But even though she seemed to want to put her club dancing on the backburner, her cha cha cha had way too much "how low can you go?" with bent knees. This could be a popular pairing, but after scoring 18, she's a long way from dreaming of the finals. (Sidebar: Hugh Hefner and HDTV were not made for each other.) Chris Jericho, who had a 19, is similar to Kendra in that you can see that he wants to be good, but it's questionable how good he's ever going to get. Given his wrestling persona, he's not going to have any trouble getting into the camp spirit of DWTS, but Cheryl Burke seemed to take pains to not have her partner do much this first week, as she handled almost all the cha cha-ing. He might just be too big a guy to ever look graceful, but as of now I'd bet he outlasts Romeo. Quick improvement needed: Model Petra Nemcova had the same 18 as Kendra, but she seemed to be the most clearly overscored dancer of the evening, in large part because the survivor of the 2004 Indian Ocean tsunami has had to deal with sad reminders of her past in the headlines recently. Her foxtrot with Dmitry Chaplin (back for the first time since Season 9) was pretty to look at, as will be the case with any activity Petra engages in, but not very content-filled. It's questionable if she has the flexibility to do much better. Sugar Ray Leonard has the right partner in Anna Trebunskaya (who has done wonders with untrained athletes), and he still has the willingness to work hard. But he might be another one who has an upper limit on how graceful he can ever look, even if he is able to get a handle on the hunched shoulders that made him look like a ninja turtle (Bruno Tonioli's words) during his foxtrot. Critical list: Question for Tom Bergeron: The Wendy Williams Show is "critically acclaimed?" Seriously?? Williams wants to be on this show so much that she actually broke into tears, but has a funny way of showing it. First, she didn't seem to know who partner Tony Dovolani was; then she barely moved during her cha cha, possibly because she was worried about doing a Humpty Dumpty on stage (Len Goodman told the buxom talk show host "you've got your dumplings boiling over"). But at least her 14 put her one point clear of "Psycho Mike" Catherwood, the Loveline co-host who poked fun at his anonymity, congratulated partner Lacey Schwimmer on not being Russian, and then cheesed it up to a ridiculous degree during their foxtrot. It doesn't help that Lacey's hair has now officially become a hot mess on a par with the site of the St. Valentine's Day Massacre.
Catherwood is funny -- he acknowledged while his score was bad, "it's better than my father, Master P." But funny people who can't dance have an even worse track record on DWTS than, say, mothers of sextuplets who can't dance -- because fans of the show want to believe that the celeb is more focused on improving than on their next punchline. With less good will to fall back on than Sugar Ray or even Wendy, he's going to have to get much better next week to have any chance of surviving.
http://www.film.com/features/story/dancing-stars-recap-geezer-power/4519413 Charlie Toft, Mar 22, 2011
He Tweets that he is still recovering from the “very famous surprise” walk-on moment.
Jimmy Kimmel is still recovering after Charlie Sheen’s surprise appearance on his late-night ABC chatfest Monday.
“We had a very very famous surprise walk-on guest tonight,” Kimmel Tweeted. “My head is still spinning...”
He later Tweeted: "Legend has it that if @charliesheen kisses you at midnight, you turn into a werewolf."
As THR previously reported, Sheen popped by Jimmy Kimmel Live! and gave the host a mug depicting a picture of a Fox.
When Kimmel asked, "Why a fox?" Sheen responded, "I'll let you figure it out, man."
A Fox spokesperson confirmed to THR Monday that Sheen, who was recently fired from CBS' Two and a Half Men, met with Fox's Mike Darnell, president of alternative entertainment; David Hill, president of Fox Sports; and Peter Rice, chairman of entertainment for Fox Networks Group last Thursday.
On Kimmel’s show, Sheen didn’t elaborate on the talks, but he did shamelessly plug his ned T-shirts and smooch the host on the lips.
As the audience applauded, Sheen - who is about to kick off a tour, Charlie Sheen LIVE: My Violent Torpedo of Truth — shouted, "Silence," and left the stage.
